Wednesday, March 18, 2009

stupid human tricks

did you ever see stupid human tricks on david letterman? somehow his producers find unusual talents such as the guy who stuffed himself into a duffel bag, the guy who drinks beer through his nose (something i might be more familiar with than i'd ever let on), or the guy who shoots milk out his eye (what?).

whenever dave airs stupid human tricks i become insanely jealous that i don't have one. i mean, i feel like most of these people have had to put themselves into dangerous situations to learn about their tricks (why do you know you can scratch your eyeballs?), but still, i should have some hidden talent, right?

the closest i've come to finding my stupid human trick is being double jointed in the knuckle closest to my hand on my middle finger. i realize this is lame.

what is your stupid human trick? how did you find it? and, can you help me find mine?


  1. he kinda reminds me of the kid from little rascals. i can fit my fist in my mouth. it might be the reason why my jaw locks up when i chew gum now.

  2. I look pretty stupid. Does that count?
    If you're stuck trying to find your stupid human trick, instead, try finding your super power! My wife is a SUPERB stick blocker! I mean, I can throw a stick at her from any direction at any speed any day EVEN WHEN SHE'S SLEEPING and she'll still block it somehow. Yup. She's amazing.

    And Reni, I've got $5 that says you can moon walk. :-O

  3. I have the amazing ability to start a new roll of 2-ply toilet paper without ripping, tearing, or otherwise mauling the first 10-30 sheets.

    Ok, I lied. It takes me at least 10 rotations of the roll to finally get the two separate "plys" to meet up and pull together. It takes a few more to roll enough paper to get past the huge gouge i put in the side while attempting to get it started.

  4. It has been said that I have been able to fit 27 marshmallows in my mouth... AT ONCE!
    I know, right? Amazing.

    Also the picture of that kid is old. He's now working as a porn star (surprise, surprise). Unfortunately, I can't tell you his name in a public forum.